"It is, my beloved, a circle."
I received a phone call from my mom around 7am last Wednesday morning. It was not a phone call one wishes to receive that early in the morning. She tells me my childhood dog, Wrigley, has passed away unexpectedly in the night. My mouth opens wide and I release a sound within me I did not know I was capable of. To describe it as crying would be a disservice. Pain, deep, soul crushing intangible pain. I wish I could have grabbed it. Dug way down, to the very bottom of my gut and pulled it out.
I have no control over my emotions. It’s something I am actively trying to work on. I always have looked at my emotions as my ally-- I hold onto them as if they were my dearest possession—I allow them to consume me. Goswami Kriyananda has taught me otherwise. His teachings focus on the path—living a life of self-awareness. There are obstacles, such as learning control over one’s emotionality-how to manage emotions in a way that you don’t have the obstacle, which makes you lose your self awareness. “Neti, neti, neti.”
I fell back asleep and when I woke up next I hoped it had been a nightmare. I reluctantly got dressed and drove to the Temple. I think the death of a pet warrants just as much grief as the death of a human. Why is it that some people find your grief less than or silly if it is the death of a beloved animal?
So, I’m at the Temple, trying to push through, complete my tasks for the day, when I come around to my last task- writing a blog to post on the Temple’s website. For the past several weeks I have chosen to post only Goswami Kriyananda’s teachings. Writing one of my own is always a challenge.
I go to the videos. To the courses, the seminars, the noon meditations-searching, for relief, for wisdom, for anything. I come across a Sunday noon meditation of The Annual Blessing for the Departed. I also come across a weekend DDR seminar. These services are when people come together to give and help the rebirthing of the souls that have transitioned. And I sit and I listen and I digest. I take it all in. Every word, every drop.
Goswami Kriyananda says:
“We live in a civilization, a society, where we’re not supposed to talk about death and yet we live in a society that has the greatest fear of death. My message is really very short and really very simple. You are immortal…”
“ There is no death, there really is only forgetfulness and all we’re trying to do is remove our fear, so that we can remember our past. To remember our past, is to remember the future, because it is my beloved, a circle.”
This really resonates with me.
“There really is not a barrier from this world and the next world, except our own imagination that there is a veil there. There is no veil there. Only our unawareness because we are lost here.”
For those of you who are struggling, who have lost a loved one, whether human or animal, who are grieving, take comfort in Goswami Kriyananda’s words and teachings. The physical loss still hurts and I am reminded of it more frequently than I would like--but Goswami teaches me that if I meditate—if I learn there is nothing to fear in death, that everything is connected, and if I find happiness, so will my loved ones.
He leaves us with this, a final reminder:
“They are not dead. They live within us and they are alive in another place. We are not separated, we are all linked. And as we find happiness and joy and humor in this life, we transfer that energy that really allows them to draw from it. If your heart is quiet, you can hear them speak back to you. Your mind will respond and resonate with what they say.”
This course was fundamental in my healing and growth. i hope it brings you as much knowledge and comfort as it did for me.
Learn to transform the "dragon" of your mind-body complex and break free of deep-seated conditionings of your past lives and hurts of this lifetime. 4 MP3 recordings and 4 videos (2 hrs 48 min)